coal, Author at The Harbor Dogs' Stories

Jun 1, 2016

17 Messes in May – by Coal

(Editors note: It is NOT RECOMMENDED you read this blog if you are queasy in general, and eating in specific. We are serious. You were warned). Hi there! It’s handsome Coal Dog and it’s my turn at the blog. I hope I don’t let you all down! We moved back to the Southport cabin and I threw […]

Jan 1, 2016

Fat Dog Food No More – by Coal

Hi there! It’s Handsome Coal Dog. I hope you are well. We had a GREAT Christmas at Chez Salty! I got a new Kick Fetch! And make sure you’re holding on to something solid when I tell you this next thing: IT GLOWS IN THE DARK! Now I can play fetch at all hours! It […]

Sep 4, 2015

The Acorn and the Anvil — by Coal

Thank you for calling me Handsome Coal Dog. I have been working on ways to become more handsome for all the nice people. There is this lovely pile of rotten seaweed in Southport I’ve been trying to work into my back and belly areas. And I just love the chance to work that warm, moisturizing, […]

Jun 1, 2015

The Breakfasts and The Dogmanity — By Coal

We’re used to a lot of craziness around Chez Salty. But you will need to suspend disbelief when I tell you what befell us 4 Good Dogs on the weekend of May 2nd. The day started out normally enough. A great day of treats and belly rubs for us boys at the shop while I […]

Jan 1, 2015

Coal in Your Stocking – By Coal

Hi there, I’m Coal the fuzzy 11-year old lab at the store. My muzzle is getting pretty gray. Thank you for not reminding me of that. I still feel 2 years old. A lot of you have been coming into the shop to say hello to me and I am nowhere to be found. But […]

Nov 1, 2014

The Buddy of My Buddy is Coal’s Friend — By Coal

Hi there, I’m Coal the fuzzy black lab at the shop who likes food, long walks on the beach, pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. I’m not into yoga, and yes, I have half a brain. And for those of you who got that song reference without web-help – congratulations! Lately things have […]

Aug 7, 2014

Coal’s Birthday 2014 – By Coal

Hi there. I’m Coal. I’m the big fuzzy Lab you’ll see asleep in front of the register. Don says I fall asleep there so I can get my fair share of attention. I just fall asleep there because I get a good view of the free treat bowl. If one of those things should accidentally […]

Oct 8, 2013

Coal’s Zombie Class 2013 – By Coal

Hi there. I’m Coal, the 10-year old black lab at Two Salty Dogs. Don calls me “The Geezer.” I’m the black lab at the shop who loves swimming, playing fetch, peanut butter treats, and affection. In fact, I like just about everything, everyone, and every dog I’ve ever met. The only thing I cannot stand is zombies. Filthy, stinking, rotten, brain-eating zombies! DOG……I hate them SO much!!!!!!!!!!!

Zombies try to hurt people, people! They try to get you and eat you! Are you people blind? Can’t you see? And you keep going about your daily lives, completely unconcerned that there’s a zombie behind the corner who would feast upon your BRAIN! And you need your brain to think about things! Things like what time my dinner is! Also it would REALLY help to have a brain to decide where we are going for walkies/swim in the morning! THANK YOU!

But you Sheeple keep pretending there are no such thing as zombies. It’s like you don’t care and you don’t protect yourself. It was around this time last year at the store we saw a SWARM of zombies and vampires and witches and ghouls and OTHER NASTY THINGS headed straight for the shop door! CAN YOU IMAGINE IT? (Editor’s note: It was last year’s Halloween Parade where all the kids dress up in costumes and Trick or Treat at the local businesses). Thankfully, Don and Liana are the smartest people I know, and they started giving the marching filth lots of treats so they would go next door and not eat their precious people brains. They also hired a gigantic white dog with black spots to keep the villains at bay (Editor’s note: He’s talking about Liana in that dog costume. It was a big hit!). We were so lucky to get out of that with our tails attached! But I don’t intend to be just lucky again. I intend to beat these ghouls.

So—Since you people are incapable of spotting a zombie unless it is gnawing on your own brain stem, I will help you because I like all LIVING creatures. I will be holding my famous “Zombie Class” on October 31st from 11am to 2pm. If you come into the shop and act like a realistic zombie, I will bark at you, and you will get a free bag of treats from Don and Liana. If you are some poseur, you will get nothing except your brain eaten later that evening by the swarm. Perhaps I will lick you or gaze into your eyes as a way of saying “Goodbye nice people. The zombies await your brain.” But if I don’t bark at you, and you don’t get those bag of treats…..you are zombie fodder.

I don’t mean to be mean. I want you people to LIVE and for you to get those treats. But I can only do so much. You have to help me. You have to FIGHT!

– I am Coal. I will protect you. IF you let me.

Hi there. I’m Coal, the 10-year old black lab at Two Salty Dogs. Don calls me “The Geezer.” I’m the black lab at the shop who loves swimming, playing fetch, peanut butter treats, and affection. In fact, I like just about everything, everyone, and every dog I’ve ever met. The only thing I cannot stand […]

Apr 12, 2013

Boothbay Region Land Trust Trails – By Coal

Coal here, My coat IS very soft and furry. Thank you for saying so. I am only as Dog made me, and I am glad you people enjoy rubbing it so much. Sometimes in the winter the rubbing builds up a static charge and it zaps my nose. So watch out. I wouldn’t want my […]

Sep 20, 2012

I am Coal. Hear Me Bark! – By Coal

Both Max and Aug say it’s about time I wrote something to earn my keep, so here I am. I am Cole. You may know me as the black lab who hangs out in front of the store with the silver beard, white stripe on my chest, and sleeps in the bushes when he’s tired […]